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by Lucy Liyou

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1.
me [0:00] the person I am. can only bring blood in the mold of a promise. dad [0:33] 아빠. what has this country promised you? for you to find this bloodshed inevitable? mom [2:34] 엄마. earnestly. you tell me. perhaps. you prefer this prejudice. that by which. when Korean people. yours apart. yours. take from you. there is a different pang to your left. a resonant bleat. that throbs like a drum. no. 인사 처럼. 손님 처럼. 인사 처럼. 손님 처럼. but you look down. and say I don’t know anymore. and I see flight. a blood Rorschach. coursing. In coursing. two heavens [6:22] and when she plants this garden. she her elbows. lift. receive. receiving a dedicated grace. from two heavens. one for you. one for passing. I wish this were enough. she gifts you three plates glazed with mugwort seeds. and all she asks of you is to remember. these conversations. and maybe selfishly. this smile. it’s okay. it’s okay. yes. amen [10:12] is this how we remember you? through tedious. vapid perspectives of this abysmal “lineage”. a few words of grace. feigned progress and healing. amen. and of. amen. 아. 아. 아. a(men). a(men) I don’t feel like. I don’t feel like. don’t be so mistaken. don’t be so mistaken. (the person I am.) (can only bring blood in the mold of a promise.) dad intermezzo [14:49] and he turns to me and says nothing. nothing was ever promised. but how else can I make sense of this. how else can I make sense of things? what is it you’d really like to say? what is it you’d really like to hear? 원한다면. 원한다면. 뭐든지. 뭐든지. me aria [17:50] 그 날 그때 그 날 그때 그 마음은 알겠는데 그 말 끝에 그 말 끝에 그 얼굴은 보이는데 그럼 난 뭔데 그럼 난 뭔데 그럼 난 뭔데 그 길이 보일때 그 길이 보일때 그 길이 안 보일때 도움 달라는 말없이 도움 달라는 말없이 도움 달라는 말없이 도움 달라는 말없이

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(yangja. here is music that reminds me of life's size.)

01 me [0:00]
02 dad [0:33]
03 mom [2:34]
04 two heavens [6:22]
05 amen [10:12]
06 dad intermezzo [14:49]
07 me aria [17:50]

all proceeds will be donated to red canary song and the families/survivors of the Atlanta shooting.

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released April 9, 2021

Composed, recorded, and produced by Lucy Liyou in Washington, March/April 2021.
Artwork by Yyed.

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Lucy Liyou Los Angeles, California

박승원.

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